


Pretty Little Thing Called Love

by ohnovaks



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Canon verse, Destiel - Freeform, First Kiss, Fluff, Human Castiel, Love Confessions, M/M, Oneshot, Season/Series 09, Supernatural Season 09, it's pretty cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-18 21:33:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16127168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohnovaks/pseuds/ohnovaks
Summary: Castiel discovers something new about being human, leading into a discussion with Dean. However, he just doesn't seem to understand what Cas is trying to tell him.





	Pretty Little Thing Called Love

 “Dean?” Castiel’s voice appeared in the silence, Dean’s trance breaking from the ceiling overhead and to the wooden door. He knew Castiel was on the other side but he couldn’t motivate himself to get up. He managed to sit his body in an upright position. He started at the door in silence for a moment, hearing a moments shuffling before Castiel continued speaking. “I wish to talk to you about something.”

 Dean fixed himself, sitting against the headboard and unwrinkling his shirt. Another period of silence followed before Dean said, “Come in, buddy.”

 Castiel opened the door, shutting it behind him gingerly. His face was nervous, but slightly eager. It was cute to see all his emotions on display since he’d became human. Emotions were so much stronger without mojo to water them down, so he was a full display. It was beautiful, and helpful as well. Cas wasn’t the best at displaying emotions in his angel days, and humans were basically prewired with all the natural reactions. Smiling, crying, yelling, glaring. If you didn’t train yourself to hide emotions - which Dean had, when he was young, - you could easily read them. 

 Dean swung his legs over the side of the bed and patted the location next to him. Cas slowly approached, sitting down. The weight shifted, causing Dean to lean over just slightly. He could smell the coconut shampoo and some almond-like lotion that Castiel applied, but he didn’t comment on it. “What’s up?”

 Castiel visibly tensed, and Dean placed a hand on his shoulder to calm him. It didn’t seem to help much, but Castiel gave a forced smile to show his appreciation for trying. Dean would have chuckled if he wasn’t so confused. “There is something bothering me recently that I was better able to dismiss when I was an angel.” He’d began, looking forward again, rather than at Dean; he’d rubbed his shoulder slightly. “I’ve consulted sources in the media…” He looked over at Dean, lips quirked as he tilted his head, “On Google,”

 He spoke this as more of a question, earning a dry laugh from the green eyed man. “I was informed that it may feel better to speak about it.”

 Dean suddenly got nervous. He’d expected this would be a chick-flick moment, which he never enjoyed, but were more tolerable with Cas. However, Castiel seemed anxious to speak about it; this only sourced unsettling thoughts from Dean. What if he were planning to leave them? What if he did some serious damage? What if he felt unappreciated, or if he didn’t need them anymore? Still, Dean told Cas to get it off of his chest.

 Castiel inhaled deeply, turning away from his best friend again to look forward. Within seconds they fell shut and he took another breath. “Becoming human has been enlightening in… various ways.” Dean thought about when he’d had sexual relations with a reaper, laughing slightly. Castiel shared this laughter, probably knowing what Dean’s thoughts had leaned toward.

 “I feel. I feel a lot more than I did as an angel. Not necessarily more, but harder.” His breathing became shaky again and Dean almost held one of his shaking hands in his own. “It has led me to realize things. These things, I already kind of knew… but now, I can’t ignore them, not like I used to.”

 “These feelings I have are so much stronger now that I am human, and I never accepted them when I was an angel. I lied to myself, and to others. I was well at hiding how I felt.” Now, he looked back at Dean, eyes wide with fear and sadness. They searched Dean’s - who was confused entirely. He wasn’t following where Castiel was going with this, which was painstaking. Unfortunately, he couldn’t just change his mind; Dean would press until Castiel bursted with emotion, which was never good.

 “I’m not so sure it’s as easy as it used to be. I always knew it would end up with me confronting these feelings like this, but I expected preparation. Here; now? I was thrown into these emotions before given time to process. And that’s not even the worst part…” Castiel laughed dryly; humorlessly, and looked to his lap. “Because everyone is still so naive to these feelings that I have. The worst thing about being human isn’t that they’re a burden to have, Dean. They’re a burden to  _ keep _ . It’s now a burden to lie… to put on this mask that feels see through. Yet nobody can see me…”

 Dean’s eyes were wide now, as if he’d realized the implications but was not sure of them yet. As if before he’d do anything, he needed clarification. “Then tell me.” He’d meant to say it with confidence, maybe some faux naivety. However, his voice was a quivering whisper. 

 “That’s what I’m trying to do, Dean!” Castiel shouted, eyes wide and hands thrown up. A silence developed for all of three seconds before Cas sighed, getting up. Dean got up immediately after, turning Castiel around before he could open the door. 

 “Lord, tell me I read this right.” He sighed, giving a gentle nudge to Cas and stepping forward. The ex-angel leaned back against the door, pupils dilated as he watched Dean’s face grow closer. Castiel, obviously impatient, grasped the sides of Dean’s face and pulled their lips together. Their hearts proved to them fireworks were real, bursting with an intense emotion stronger than anything they’d felt before. Their lips tingled, and Castiel’s fingertips felt like fire as they pressed against Dean’s face, burning his jawline. Dean’s hands feverishly tangled through Castiel's already messy hair.

 When their lips separated, their eyes met in a dazed, lovestruck gaze. “How long did you…?” Castiel asked, eyes squinting and head tilting.

 “I mean I hoped you were talking about me about-”

 “No, Dean. How long did you, uh… Have feelings? For me, I mean?” His hands slowly fell from Dean’s face, one on his shoulder and the other clasping his now more-than-friend’s hand into his own. 

 “I mean, I’m not sure. I kinda always liked your power… The way you handled situations; how you handled me. You put me in my place, I needed it. ‘Always admired you for that… but, I think the entire purgatory experience really drew the line between admiration and…” Dean paused. Castiel knew; Dean knew. Still, he’d never said it. In other forms, he brought feeling to the light, but never those three explicitly. 

 “It’s okay, Dean. I know.” He nodded, and Dean relaxed. He didn’t need to say them yet; he would eventually, of course, but not there. Not now. Instead, he pulled Castiel forward again. That was all he needed. 


End file.
